Parenting after divorce is not easy, but with God, The Good News Is...it is possible.
In 2017, after my marriage ended, my children (at the time 8, 6, and 5) and I moved into a new home. They began a new school, a new routine - now consisting of going to their dad's home every other weekend. They lost the daily physical access to their dad which was a major adjustment. During this time, I had to learn how to parent my children through this fragile season of their lives. Due to their ages and needs, each child's reaction to the divorce was different. For example, my oldest was 8. She remembered life with mom and dad being in the same home; therefore, making her experience different from her siblings.
Today, I would like to share a few of the strategies I implemented during this process to create the new foundation for my family:
Therapy - individual therapy and family therapy.
Freedom for them to express their emotions without the fear of me getting upset.
Creating a safe space atmosphere.
Being honest with my children when they asked me questions about the divorce.
Never spoke negatively about their father and kept communicating with him, openly.
Letting them know repeatedly they were not to blame and were loved by both parents.
Lots of date nights with the four of us.
Letting them see me cry.
Not introducing my children to anyone new.
A lot of prayer - A LOT
You see, I had to rebuild trust as their mom. At times, I had to be uncomfortable, have difficult conversations to make sure they were comfortable. But to God be the glory, six years later, (now ages 14, 13, and 11), I can see the fruit of the sacrifices that were made. We are not perfect, but I am extremely proud of their resilience and their ability to navigate through changes that comes with life.
No, it wasn't easy, but because I welcomed grace for growth, I was able to witness one of the most beautiful transformations in watching my children flourish into normal, cantakerous, funny, non-listening (at times), fierce, honorable, compassionate and beautiful - in every sense of the word, teenagers and young adults.
My crew. Gabs, Jordan, and Ash. I love them dearly!
Have a beautiful day!
Great tips on maneuvering through divorce with children! I really enjoyed reading this post!♥️